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Ecclesiastical Monachopsis

1/19/2016

18 Comments

 
Have you ever been in the situation where you feel that you just don’t quite fit in? That everyone else in whatever group you happen to be with seems to slip right into the mould but you feel just a bit uncomfortable? It isn’t that you particularly dislike the people, it’s just that you don’t quite seem to dovetail as well as everyone else with everyone else and the environment. This is called monachopsis (mon-a-kop-sis), the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place; that you just don’t quite fit.
 
I suffer from a particular form of this affliction: Ecclesiastical Monachopsis. That is, the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place; that I just don’t quite fit in to conventional church (Ecclesia in Greek).
 
It isn’t that I particularly dislike the people (not all of them anyway), nor is it that I dislike gathering with the purpose of focusing on God, engaging in worship and learning (or even teaching as I do quite often) on Christ centred life and biblical understanding. In fact I love these things very much. I am, though it may seem an oxymoron, and perhaps a future blog will emerge on this, a contemplative extrovert. I love being with other people. I love chatting about real things (not a great surface converser) and I love spending time with folk over food and drink, whether it’s a meal, a cup of tea, or a pint of ale at the pub. I love engaging in different kinds and styles of worship. I don’t just mean singing, although as a musician I enjoy that style of worship, I mean practically and physically engaging in different acts of worship, spontaneous as well as ritualised. Anyone who knows me will agree that I do like to talk. I do like to teach. And I do love to pass on to whoever wants to listen anything which has helped me in my personal life journey, especially if it has helped me gain a deeper and more authentic relationship with the Divine. So in essence, I love the practical side of what happens in most churches on most Sundays. But I just can’t shake that feeling of ecclesiastical monachopsis.
 
 
I think a big part of why I feel I suffer from ecclesiastical monachopsis is that I just don’t think the mainstream presentation from the modern church is quite what Christianity is supposed to be. I think Christianity, as a faith, has slipped quite seriously from what Jesus was all about and what he, and those who taught immediately following his departure, meant by living in a relationship with God. In my experience, and I can only speak from my own experience, Church as an institutionalised organisation, on the whole, has become something apart from the teachings and person of Christ.
 
The term ‘Christian’, which has today become the title of a religion and a religious identification, was first made as a statement about the life and behaviour of a community of followers of the teachings of Jesus Christ. It is recorded in Acts 11v26 that the followers of Christ were first called ‘Christians’ in Antioch. The word ‘Christian’ is the Greek word ‘Christianos’ and means ‘Christ-like’.  It has the suffix ‘ian’ which means ‘with the same meaning and properties as: an, ian.’ The latter is the more productive of the two suffixes in recent coinage, especially when the base noun ends in a consonant: Orwellian; Washingtonian; Christian. That means that this community of believers in Antioch was so much like the Christ they said they followed that they were identified as having the same properties, or qualities as Christ. This is, it seems, a far cry from many today who use the term ‘Christian’ to identify themselves, and of those who Mahatma Gandhi must have encountered in the mid-20th century for him to say ‘I love your Christ. It is just that so many of you Christians are so unlike your Christ’. What has happened to cause such a chasm to have been created between the believers in Antioch and those in the 20th century whom Gandhi experienced, and those in the 21st century whom many outside the church (and often those within it, including myself) encounter today?
 
One of the key verses in scripture for me is 1 John 2v6 which says ‘[t]hose who say they live in God (or, in this context are Christians) should live their lives as Christ did’. This seems a pretty straight forward statement. Be like Christ. But something is not right.
 
I have a book by the author Margaret Silf which is a collation of stories. In this book, entitled ‘one hundred Wisdom Stories from around the world’, there is a story called The Firemaker. In this story we enter into an imagined time where people lived but knew nothing of fire. Then a man who could make fire enters a village. He shows them this amazing thing, teaches them how to use it properly so that it does not hurt them. Shows them how to use it for heat, light, firing clay, and cooking. The Firemaker finally teaches the villagers how to make fire themselves. The village elders do not like this and decide they must get rid of the Firemaker, and the only way they will be able to do this is by killing him. But his death only seems to encourage the people more. So the village elders decide to control the Firemaker following which was beginning to build up. If folk wanted to celebrate the Firemaker, then they could do it in contained meetings and specially built buildings. The village elders would organise the gatherings and would control the way in which they went. After a time the gatherings of the followers of the Firemaker became a regular thing. The followers remained faithful and paid homage to the life of the Firemaker telling stories of him and great rituals built up around the gatherings. But, as the story ends, ‘there was no fire’.
 
I think the story of the Firemaker is an excellent reflection (as is its intent) of what has happened to Christianity from the time of Christ to its mainstream expression today. Throughout Christian history pockets of fire have risen, as they do today, but it has never become ‘mainstream’. I have a desire to make fire, but I do not always find others with the same desire, so I feel out of place. Pyrotechnic monachopsis!
 
 
So what is the answer to my ecclesiastical monachopsis? To be honest I am not sure there is one, I am not sure I will ever get over it, as I am not sure that a 2,000 year old institution can be that radically changed. Not in one generation anyway. But the individuals who are its make up can be. Signs are beginning to emerge that people who are absolutely convinced that Christ is the way are becoming discontent with the current expressions and teachings within the modern church. Questions are being raised. Doubts are being aired. Books are being written (*). Fire is emerging not just in individuals, but in groups of people.
 
I don’t wish to throw the baby out with the bathwater, as has been the repeated pattern in church history when a ‘new way’ emerges. I don’t want to stop gathering with other people to worship and learn about God; or encouraging folk and building them up in their faith – I like those things. I want to draw on the wonder and richness of our spiritual heritage, I want to live a life like Christ, even when that might conflict with the church institution. I want to learn from and be accountable to those who make fire, whose lives are tested and proven to have depth, breadth, and to be Christ-like, not just those who happen to have gained a qualification and position in leadership.
Ecclesiastical monachopsis may be something which I will have to live with, but it isn’t something I have to resign myself to suffering from (they are not the same thing at all). I can make a difference. This is one of the reasons I felt God calling me to start Waymark Ministries in the first place, and create opportunities for those who feel the same as I do, hence the tagline ‘The message of Christ for spiritual seekers’. Having already quoted Mahatma Gandhi in this blog, I will end with another quote attributed to him which seems fitting here and sums up why I do what I do: “Be the change you want to see in the world” (or church).
 
 
 
 
(*) one or two bits of further reading:
A New Kind of Christianity. Brian McLaren
Church: why bother. Philip Yancey
So you don’t want to go to church anymore. Wayne Jacobsen & Dave Coleman
A Churchless Faith – Faith journeys beyond the churches. Alan Jamieson
18 Comments
Tadhg link
1/19/2016 07:54:59 am

Many thanks for sharing that.

Thoroughly well written, and the contents are such that I can empathise with you, completely, as Im sure others can. I pray for change to a more authentic expression of faith, and I do believe, little by little, in the lives of those that are aware, things will change - indeed are changing. Thank you for sharing that, which will encourage so many who will identify with it.

Tadhg

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David Cole link
1/19/2016 10:20:40 am

Thank you Tadhg (interesting name). I can, indeed see a growth in those who are stepping out, which makes for the change. Slowly but surely. The old parable of the little girl on the beach full of starfish after the storm comes to mind (if you know that one)>

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Sandy
1/19/2016 09:16:53 am

I have not felt "in place" in all of life! I am quite an introvert and it has been a challenge learning how to live in this world. I do enjoy one-on-one or a small group, getting together with intention, something of a deeper level, not just everyday fluff. I am in the US and am not happy with church here, altho I do live in a small, rural area. I have not attended a live service for over a year. It's too much like entertainment followed by a spiritually milky message; God does not want me spending my time that way. I do thank Him for the internet and all the services I can either "attend" live online or watch at another time. But even there, there is not a lot of spiritually meaty teaching, and a lot of the singing is so dramatic, really not a style that draws the congregation into true worship of God. I long for the Book of Acts style church, where believers gather to share what God is doing in their lives, receive teaching from someone who has prepared under God's guidance, sing praise from the heart, pray for one another, perhaps share a meal, and go out truly spiritually refreshed, strengthened, and excited to go live in this world for the Lord. In the meantime, my simple life allows me to draw constantly closer to God, and it seems to be that He likes that. Bless you as you forge ahead for the Lord!

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David Cole link
1/19/2016 10:23:00 am

Thank you Sandy. The book 'So you don't want to go to church anymore' which i mentioned in the blog looks at the concept of a book of Acts style church in modern American culture. If you haven't read it, i would recommend it.

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Br. Jack+, LC link
1/19/2016 10:59:05 am

Great post, David! I, too, suffer from "ecclesiastical monachopsis." I'm more convinced than ever that the "religious business institution" (what I like to call the "church" of today) was never the intention. Christ came to establish the rescue the cosmos, establish the Realm of God, and show us The Way of living; of being truly human and full of God.

Thanks again for such a great post.

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David Cole
1/21/2016 01:05:14 am

Thank you for your encouragement Br Jack

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Amy
1/19/2016 11:10:48 am

I am another sufferer. It becomes even more challenging when I am considering what to pass on to my children. I am constantly debating if I should bring them to church for education, and which one. I grew up Catholic and the sacrements are very important to my family. And there are so many things I learned which have helped me along the way. But as you say, I don't feel I fit in anywhere these days so I don't feel comfortable bringing them anywhere for long.

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David Cole
1/21/2016 01:10:56 am

This is something that my wife and I consider often, Amy. For us, we feel that the spiritual atmosphere and the way in which my wife and I as parents live with/within the Divine at home is a more important part of the education and development of our children's spirituality than going to church on a Sunday (which we still sometimes do). This includes reading scripture and stories from it and other great Christian folk of the ages (obviously my children get a lot of stories about the Celtic Christians, that being something i teach for a living). We also engage in our own spiritual family 'rituals', including a Shabbat meal every Friday evening, which includes family time as well as spiritual focus (and good food!!!).
It is an incredibly important consideration for those of us who are parents.

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Barbara Benjamin
1/19/2016 01:18:39 pm

It is because of this very condition that I chose to remain in the Church and I was convinced that Jesus may feel the same at times. The condition provides some objectivity and a reason to seek God for answers. In so doing you become His instrument in His Church, for growth. When paradigms shift in communities, change happens fast but before then a strong foundation is laid ever so slowly. This process starts with the feeling of dis-ease, dissociation and a choice.

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David Cole
1/21/2016 01:15:07 am

This is also the reason that i became a full time church minister some years ago. But found swiftly that there were far too many restrictions once you have a position within the institution, so that only lasted half a dozen years. Now I make it my deliberate intention that Waymark Ministries works alongside and with support of the local churches. I am invited to local and wider meetings and meals for church leaders, etc...
I perhaps embody the quote by Winston Churchill: "My relationship with the church is like that of the flying buttress, I support it from the outside." - Although i am sneakily within it too!

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Florian link
1/23/2016 06:42:02 am

Yes, can definetly identify with this - including being a contemplative extrovert (actually, the longer I walk the mystic path, the more extrovert I've become, but that's another story). Also read most of the books you've recommended to deal with this issue, and they helped me a lot, all in their own way. In the end it was really the last quote from Ghandi, that woke me up from my resignation and passive suffering. Contemplative practice has been an enourmous help in this regard, so as not fall back into the same trap again, resulting from what Brennan Manning called the 'Abba-Experience'. I love this idea of a ministry to reach out to spiritual seekers to connect them to the reality of Christ, without all the eccleciastical baggage that so many of us have encountered and needed to get rid off on this journey. For I think, that these kinds of ministries will become more and more important these days. Thanks for sharing!

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David Cole
2/3/2016 06:33:01 am

Thank you Florian. May you journey well and see great adventures with God!

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Gill
1/25/2016 01:49:57 pm

With you David

Bless your heart

We are kindred spirits

Look forward to meeting you

We journey together

He is just awesome...lets just soak in Him and let Him do the rest

G:)

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David Cole
2/3/2016 06:33:37 am

Thank you Gill

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Amber Cole
4/10/2016 01:18:20 pm

Awesome post. I definitely agree that you love to talk! I think the most important thing we need to do as Christians is to keep focused on Christ and He will do the rest but sometimes we need the patience to sit and wait (something I'm terrible at). However, whatever God has in store, it is a rollercoaster of a ride full of amazing blessings.

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Sandra Delemare link
4/14/2016 11:08:30 am

Thanks for a new word. Mono chop sis (sorry had to do this as on kindle). All my life I've felt a bit of a square peg, although maybe not so much of the ecclesiastical variety - or maybe it's because God found me a church (and he told me he'd find me a church) where even an oddball like me can feel at home. As ever, enjoying your writing David.

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Andrea Harding
4/30/2016 01:52:23 am

Picked up links to this post from Aidan and Hilda newsletter-
Could relate so much to this post, as I have always felt like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole as far as church is concerned(although part of established church, for many years) I am not criticising it but I came to realise that it just wasn't where Iwas at.
So about 10 years ago set sail (metaphorically speaking) in my little boat, still feels the right thing just find it quite lonely at times.
I too have found the books you mentioned helpful.

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Tim Powers link
1/18/2022 08:49:44 pm

Thank you for putting a name on what I've felt for a long time. And I'm a pastor. About 17 years ago, I was standing in the sanctuary of the church I was pastoring at the time and asked myself three questions. 1. Is this what Jesus had in mind when he thought of the church? 2. Is this all that the church is meant to be? and 3. Is this worth giving the rest of my life to? The answer to all three questions was no. Since then, I've been trying to be the change I want to see in the church. Maybe it's harder to be that change when you're a pastor; I don't know. But I agree that God seems to have something afoot these days. My favorite seminary professor (now retired) has written a series of blogs about it, and he calls it an Awakening. I don't know what it will be, but I do think something is happening and more and more folks are waking up to it. I do think the Celtic and Contemplative streams of Christianity will have a lot to do with what's coming.

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